Lies and manipulation of the truth are key hallmarks of a narcissists behaviour…
The lies they tell you, and the lies they tell others about you.
They live with a false persona hidden behind their mask, and they know that the truth will expose everything they’ve been trying to hide…
They work to their own agenda's, and they'll employ any tactic to prevent their image from being tarnished.
So they lie ferociously, lie upon lie, to protect their innocent do no wrong image that they've very cleverly crafted.
I can honestly say from my own personal experiences that finding out about the extremities of the lies told by someone you once loved so dearly, is one of the most painful parts in coming to terms with narcissistic or emotional abuse.
And it’s one of the most intensely confusing parts of your healing journey.
Because everything that you held onto that you thought was good about the relationship, things you held so close to your heart; suddenly all becomes something that was just never real.
It was just part of their manipulative game.
The narcissist the came into my life, by clinical definition would be considered as a borderline pathological liar.
As I’ve discovered along the path of my own healing journey, they knowingly lied directly to my face hundreds of times over.
They were so good at speaking their lies, I couldn’t even tell…
Even LONG after everything has subsided, I STILL to this very day continue to find out and hear about more lies.
They just keep surfacing one after another…
The intensity and ferocity of their lies is nothing short of sickening.
This part of narcissism is truly disgusting.
Because their lies are disgusting.
The realisation of coming to terms with the fact that the sweet, innocent person that I thought I knew, that in fact wasn’t real at all, was gut wrenching.
They hid behind their mask while in reality a very evil and deceptive manipulator was lurking in the background...
A narcissist will consistently lie about everything in order to slant a scenario, an event, or a set of circumstances the way they want.
They don’t have any values, they certainly don’t have empathy or remorse for what they do; and they don’t care who they hurt…
We’re left in such a confused state as to how they’ve even come to a conclusion in their own heads to even speak the lies they’ve come up with.
But it’s impossible for us to understand, because we’re not like them.
We wouldn’t do what they did.
Because you are decent human being.
And this is a really important piece to understand throughout your healing journey…
There will be times when you just simply can’t understand why they did something;
because no normal, decent person would do what they did.
They live in a world that is filled with a sense of grandiose and false self-perceptions of themselves, ego, and self-preservation.
So their lies that they speak, to them; in their own head sounds like the truth…
They don’t think they're lying.
Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) is a form of mental illness.
Anyone that’s ever struggled from mental illness before knows that when you’re unwell, reality becomes warped.
And their reality and perceptions are warped, and that’s why they don’t see anything wrong with what they do, or with the lies they tell;
because they believe their own lies.
They live in a distorted reality.
Finding out about their lies is always like a stab through the heart with a sharp knife, no matter how much time has passed.
But realise that each lie they tell is just them trying to continue their manipulation of you.
Because now that they can’t control you and manipulate you, they will try to manipulate how everyone else see’s you.
And they do this through their false stories and lies.
But remember, that the people in your life that really matter; they will always be respectful enough to listen to the truth, to hear both sides of a story…
The one’s who matter will know the truth.
And one day, karma will catch up with their lies and they will face their own narcissistic collapse or implosion.
Yes, it’s actually a thing…
But that’s a story for another day…
~ Mark